Shirley Enebrad

Author, Speaker & Grief Counselor

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Reflections on childhood

Reflections on childhood

March 17, 2018 by Shirley Enebrad 2 Comments

Marty Rose and I grew up in the same neighborhood. He was in my older brothers’ age range. When I was a kid he would walk by on his way home from high school with an armload of books. He was always funny and cool and a real smart alec. It was sad to find out the other day that he had unexpectedly crossed over the rainbow bridge. As with other reports of death, it made me reflect on the past,  my recollections of Marty and the rest of the Juneau St. neighborhood families. We lived in a mostly Catholic neighborhood so there were kids in just about every house We had so many kids running around that it was easy to field teams for softball, kickball, football, or just about anything. Life was carefree.

I was profoundly sad that at my age more losses are occurring. Then, it hit me in the face that Marty wasn’t the first neighborhood kid to cross over the bridge. Some with one, two, six or 12 kids. One family has already buried at least three. My own brother Bobby died two and a half years ago.  Hearing about Marty made me go right back to when Bobby left his body behind. I am sure others who knew and loved Marty were drawn back to previous losses too. It is only natural after all but it is sad just the same.

Then, this morning I was sorting through books and getting my office organized and I found a slip of well-worn paper given to me by my friend Ann Wilson after her husband Ted died. It is one of the best descriptions of grief I have ever seen. It helped Ann tremendously so I want to share it here.

“GRIEF IS A POWERFUL RIVER in flood. It cannot be argued or reasoned or wrestled down to an insignificant trickle. You must let it take you where it is going. When it pulls you under, all you can do is keep your eyes open for rocks and fallen trees, try not to panic, and stay faceup so you will know where the sky is. You will need that information later. Eventually, its waters calm and you will be on the shore far from where you began, raw and sore, but clean and as close to whole as you will ever be again.” This is on page 219 of ‘The Storm.’

Dear Cindy, Lynette, Barb, Beth, Nora, Sandi, Laurel and all of my other friends and loved ones who became widowed too young and for those mourning the death of a child, sibling, parent, friend, grandparent, auntie or uncle, I hope this helps you as much as it helped Ann.

Just flow with it and grief won’t break you, eventually, the water will recede and calm down and the whole ordeal will make you stronger. Reminds me of he lyrics of a hymn, “I got peace like a river…in my soul.” Hang in there and hopefully, before you know it, you will get to that place of calm and peace.

Be well,

Shirley

Blog, Grief, Life and Living, Self Care Tagged: grief, peace, sad

Comments

  1. Shari says

    March 18, 2018 at 7:01 pm

    Beautiful message for those grieving a loved one. Will share with my sister-in-law who just lost her husband too soon.
    Love you Shirley!

    Reply
    • Shirley Enebrad says

      March 18, 2018 at 10:06 pm

      Thanks Shari. Hugs to you and please give Sue my best.

      Reply

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Reviews & Testimonials

I just have to tell you that your book has become a part of me.  I have milked it by only reading it when I was alone and quiet.  I feel I know little Cory now.  It has been a privilege getting to know his sweet spirit.  Thank you so much for sharing a small part of him with me.  I would love to see the video that was made.  Bless your heart for the pure love and strength that you instilled in your sweet baby.  Cory is a true gift to all who get to share his story.
Pamala Butler Iacovitti, Wichita Falls, Texas (after reading Over the Rainbow Bridge)
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The written word can be very powerful and moving, and every so often there is a book that can truly change lives; Over the Rainbow Bridge is that important. It is a true account of a heroic child’s mission in his short life to teach us about love and life, that one and both are the same: eternal. In our culture, where death is almost a taboo subject, Over the Rainbow Bridge will help us confront our fears and embrace life in a “down to earth” way. It is accessible, a comfort to read, as if being embraced by an old friend.
Gei Chan, well-read Artist & Designer
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Shirley, I can’t tell you how much your book touched my life. Your son was an amazing boy-such an upbeat, inspiring, beautiful little boy… although I cried, I also celebrated the person he was. And your writing made me feel like I was a part of your life with your son, instead of just reading about it. Images came to mind. Like when you had to walk that long distance to the hospital with your son in your arms after your car broke down. There were so many others… and the laughs I had with the ghosts!  The feelings I experienced while reading –I … Read more
Lisa Salvati, TV News Reporter, New York (after reading Over the Rainbow Bridge)
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Although I haven’t experienced too much loss, this short, to-the-point book gave me a wealth of very important information on how to help others cope with grief, and how to know what to expect when it happens to me. I learned about things to say and not to say to those grieving, and how important it is to let yourself go through the process when you experience loss. The author knows what she is talking about, as she has experienced extensive loss herself. Concise and helpful tips!
P. Pacelli, Sammamish, WA (after reading Six-Word Lessons on Coping with Grief)
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Books are often described as good, exciting, motivational, or inspirational. Rarely do you find one that is truly life transforming. ‘Over the Rainbow Bridge’ is just such a book. It is absolutely miraculous the impact the story of this little nine your old child had on my perception of life, death, and God. My life has been inspired and enhanced by Cory’s story. If you are depressed for any reason, you will have a change of heart and mind after reading how Cory dealt with every day life in the short time he was here on earth. I can hardl… Read more
Carrie D. Hewitt, Newly Encouraged Mother of Four
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This is a must read for anyone who is grieving the loss of a loved one.. It is a quick read and knowing that the author has dealt with loss helps you to know that there is no right or wrong way to grieve, we all deal in our own ways. I have read this book three times so far and each time I find something new to help me with the loss of my granddaughter. I will continue to read over and over again and I plan to purchase this book for any friend or family going through this process!
Barb Bottman, Snohomish, WA (after reading Six-Word Lessons on Coping with Grief)
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Cory was my favorite patient ever and he taught me more than I could ever teach him. His lessons about Summerland (the afterlife) were profound and his drawings of what he saw ‘Over the Rainbow Bridge’ helped thousands of people get in touch with their long-buried emotions.
Dr. Elisabeth Kubler Ross, Famed researcher & author of 16 books ‘On Death and Dying’
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Over the Rainbow Bridge is an intelligent and emotional book that exhibits an unforgettable life and death of a child wise beyond his young years. You don’t have to be grieving to get Cory’s life lessons.
Karen Minton, MA, CAN, Gosnell Memorial Hospice House, Maine
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Over the Rainbow Bridge is an intelligent and emotional book that exhibits an unforgettable life and death of a child wise beyond his young years. You don’t have to be grieving to get Cory’s life lessons.
Karen Minton, MA, CAN, Gosnell Memorial Hospice House, Maine
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I loved this very human and touching story of a family’s journey with a terminally ill child. Although it was sad, it was also courageous and funny. It was far more about living than about dying, and offers a positive example for all of us to value each day. The messages about life beyond death’s door are intriguing, uplifting, and very believable. Thank you for a beautiful read.
Marcia Shaver (after reading Over the Rainbow Bridge)
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