Shirley Enebrad

Author, Speaker & Grief Counselor

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Navigating our life’s journey…

Navigating our life’s journey…

September 4, 2014 by Shirley Enebrad 1 Comment

When someone you care about dies it is very common to re-experience or re-visit grief from a previous loss. It is much like navigating a map… a map of your pain and experiences. My friend’s father died yesterday. He was one of the most incredibly kind, generous, thoughtful and inspiring men I have ever had the good fortune to meet in my life. His daughter Alycia was my best friend for many years. Then, she introduced me to her favorite sister Susan and I fell in love with her too. They became my sisters of the heart. Their father was ill earlier but with prayer seemed to get better and stronger. Then, I heard that he was in remission. So, I am not sure what exactly happened but he was recently hospitalized and then sadly he crossed over the rainbow bridge. To hear of his crossing over not only made me sad but it brought back the sadness I felt when his daughter Alycia died unexpectedly. In some ways I felt as if knowing that they are together again was a really good thing but then, the second thought that washed over me was that they are both gone too soon. I wasn’t through loving and caring about either of them. Then, that feeling lead me to another place in my grief history and thoughts of my parents and how those losses felt. Then, I remembered how my parents and I reacted when my little boy died and so it goes when you start recalling so many other losses. It really was like a snowball effect. So, with each passing the grief rears up and hits the tender spots of your heart, mind and soul again and again. I hope that knowing that this is a normal occurrence will help newly bereaved people or just about anyone! I cannot stress this point enough. So the next question is — what if anything can be done about it? This might sound like a broken record but if you focus on the good times and good memories it helps. If you talk about him or her and laugh about the good times it helps. If you remember that we all have a map laid out before us and that we must navigate the various paths along our life’s journey and acknowledge that sometimes (or should I say that oftentimes?) we are faced with rugged and rocky obstacles in our way but if we are sure footed and purposeful about how we step and stay the course that we can and do survive. It isn’t always easy but all of the lessons we learn along the way make us stronger if we don’t let them overwhelm us.

RIP Roy Long Sr.

Be well,
Shirley

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Comments

  1. Nora Strothman says

    September 5, 2014 at 9:36 pm

    This is so true.

    Reply

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Reviews & Testimonials

I just have to tell you that your book has become a part of me.  I have milked it by only reading it when I was alone and quiet.  I feel I know little Cory now.  It has been a privilege getting to know his sweet spirit.  Thank you so much for sharing a small part of him with me.  I would love to see the video that was made.  Bless your heart for the pure love and strength that you instilled in your sweet baby.  Cory is a true gift to all who get to share his story.
Pamala Butler Iacovitti, Wichita Falls, Texas (after reading Over the Rainbow Bridge)
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Over the Rainbow Bridge is an intelligent and emotional book that exhibits an unforgettable life and death of a child wise beyond his young years. You don’t have to be grieving to get Cory’s life lessons.
Karen Minton, MA, CAN, Gosnell Memorial Hospice House, Maine
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Cory was my favorite patient ever and he taught me more than I could ever teach him. His lessons about Summerland (the afterlife) were profound and his drawings of what he saw ‘Over the Rainbow Bridge’ helped thousands of people get in touch with their long-buried emotions.
Dr. Elisabeth Kubler Ross, Famed researcher & author of 16 books ‘On Death and Dying’
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Although I haven’t experienced too much loss, this short, to-the-point book gave me a wealth of very important information on how to help others cope with grief, and how to know what to expect when it happens to me. I learned about things to say and not to say to those grieving, and how important it is to let yourself go through the process when you experience loss. The author knows what she is talking about, as she has experienced extensive loss herself. Concise and helpful tips!
P. Pacelli, Sammamish, WA (after reading Six-Word Lessons on Coping with Grief)
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Shirley, I can’t tell you how much your book touched my life. Your son was an amazing boy-such an upbeat, inspiring, beautiful little boy… although I cried, I also celebrated the person he was. And your writing made me feel like I was a part of your life with your son, instead of just reading about it. Images came to mind. Like when you had to walk that long distance to the hospital with your son in your arms after your car broke down. There were so many others… and the laughs I had with the ghosts!  The feelings I experienced while reading –I … Read more
Lisa Salvati, TV News Reporter, New York (after reading Over the Rainbow Bridge)
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I loved this very human and touching story of a family’s journey with a terminally ill child. Although it was sad, it was also courageous and funny. It was far more about living than about dying, and offers a positive example for all of us to value each day. The messages about life beyond death’s door are intriguing, uplifting, and very believable. Thank you for a beautiful read.
Marcia Shaver (after reading Over the Rainbow Bridge)
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The written word can be very powerful and moving, and every so often there is a book that can truly change lives; Over the Rainbow Bridge is that important. It is a true account of a heroic child’s mission in his short life to teach us about love and life, that one and both are the same: eternal. In our culture, where death is almost a taboo subject, Over the Rainbow Bridge will help us confront our fears and embrace life in a “down to earth” way. It is accessible, a comfort to read, as if being embraced by an old friend.
Gei Chan, well-read Artist & Designer
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The greatest gift I received from reading “Over the Rainbow Bridge” is a comforting peace about death and dying. Death is not an ending, but the beginning of a new phase. Powerful. Thanks Cory for your wisdom.Through the life of this 9 year old boy, I learned more insights about heaven and the afterlife than I ever learned by attending church. I don’t know who I’m more impressed with—Cory, a young man who even in death was the most positive, inspirational person I never met; or his mother Shirley who had the courage to really list… Read more
Shelly Heesacker, Freelance TV Field Producer for ‘Oprah’ and ‘The Dr. Phil Show’
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This primer on grief is practical , honest, and totally on the money about feelings, thoughts, and behaviors which are part of the human experience of grief and loss. The six word lessons are understandable, strengthening, and probably because there are only ‘six words’ easily remembered. It also takes direct aim at the guilt experienced about ‘the need to talk about it’.
William M Womack MD, Psychiatrist ("Six Word Lessons" On Coping with Grief)
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Having dealt with the loss of my son, I can totally relate to this book. While reading it, I found myself reflecting back to the “stupid” things that people said to me when I was in the throes of so much pain that I couldn’t see past the very next second. I am comforted by Shirley’s words which are down to earth and easily understood. This book WILL help you if you let it. It is a quick read and is one of the things that I like most about it. Grief is a lifelong journey that changes over time so take care of your heart and read this book. It is… Read more
April Braykovich (Kirkland, WA) (after reading Six-Word Lessons on Coping with Grief)
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