Shirley Enebrad

Author, Speaker & Grief Counselor

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Mourning the loss of place

Mourning the loss of place

October 18, 2021 by Shirley Enebrad Leave a Comment

I recently traveled to Seattle for a dear friend’s memorial service. I hadn’t been there to visit for just a few years. I moved away ten years ago. In the last five years or so, every NW visitor to Maui that we spent time with lamented the homeless problems in Seattle. I had hoped they were exaggerating but driving around the city of my childhood and a majority of my adult life – just broke my heart. Once determined to be America’s  Most Livable City, now it’s just tattered mess. The homeless situation was on full display throughout the city. This problem has not been dealt with by the city council, in fact, they have made it worse. It’s a problem throughout our country but in Seattle  the Council has handed over the keys to the city to the homeless and taxpaying homeowners and business owners are stuck. Police are unable to help. The mayor and Police Chief both quit because they were stymied at every turn. For example, if you leave an inoperable vehicle on the street parked in front of your house for more than three days you can get a fine and a big fat towing bill too. If someone lives in an inoperable vehicle in front of your house, junks up your yard, and worse — they are considered “homesteaders” and there is no legal recourse for you as the homeowner. Example number two — There is an elementary school in Seattle where a homeless camp is being allowed on the school’s grounds. The children cannot go out to recess to play because of the dangers from needles on the ground and a naked guy who wanders around.

Everywhere we went the first thing folks talked about was the homeless. I feel for people who have lost their homes, jobs, etc. I do. But, they don’t clean up after themselves and there is no regard for others. Many of our friends have moved out of the city limits because they cannot stomach their yards being used as open air toilets. There is a stretch of road that was cut in a hillside and runs between West Seattle and Burien that is lined with majestic evergreens. I used to love that route. Now it smells like a sewer and there is rubbish from the top of the hill on each side and flows down to the road. The beauty of a once gorgeous city is marred by rubbish. The graffiti is almost as bad as New York’s. I didn’t even venture to the downtown area. My mother-in-law is afraid to go there. SAD. The whole experience was just sad.

A friend wrote a blogpost last week about this same issue. She is a property owner and property manager, the stories she told made my stomach roil in horror. She too grew up in a city she was proud to call home. Now, not so much. Someone in Seattle must have a viable plan to fix the problems. First they have to purge that council and get in a balance of values. Far far left is just as bad a far far right.

I am mourning the loss of the place where I grew up. We are going again soon for my niece’s wedding. I am not even looking forward to the visit besides the wedding. I don’t think my heart can take it. Since I am powerless to do anything about it, because I no longer reside there, my only means of self-care is to avoid going back. That won’t last forever though because my brothers and sisters still live on the outskirts of town but at least they don’t live in the city limits.

Be well,

 

Shirley

Blog, Grief, Life and Living, Self Care

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Reviews & Testimonials

I just have to tell you that your book has become a part of me.  I have milked it by only reading it when I was alone and quiet.  I feel I know little Cory now.  It has been a privilege getting to know his sweet spirit.  Thank you so much for sharing a small part of him with me.  I would love to see the video that was made.  Bless your heart for the pure love and strength that you instilled in your sweet baby.  Cory is a true gift to all who get to share his story.
Pamala Butler Iacovitti, Wichita Falls, Texas (after reading Over the Rainbow Bridge)
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Over the Rainbow Bridge is an intelligent and emotional book that exhibits an unforgettable life and death of a child wise beyond his young years. You don’t have to be grieving to get Cory’s life lessons.
Karen Minton, MA, CAN, Gosnell Memorial Hospice House, Maine
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Cory was my favorite patient ever and he taught me more than I could ever teach him. His lessons about Summerland (the afterlife) were profound and his drawings of what he saw ‘Over the Rainbow Bridge’ helped thousands of people get in touch with their long-buried emotions.
Dr. Elisabeth Kubler Ross, Famed researcher & author of 16 books ‘On Death and Dying’
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Although I haven’t experienced too much loss, this short, to-the-point book gave me a wealth of very important information on how to help others cope with grief, and how to know what to expect when it happens to me. I learned about things to say and not to say to those grieving, and how important it is to let yourself go through the process when you experience loss. The author knows what she is talking about, as she has experienced extensive loss herself. Concise and helpful tips!
P. Pacelli, Sammamish, WA (after reading Six-Word Lessons on Coping with Grief)
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Shirley, I can’t tell you how much your book touched my life. Your son was an amazing boy-such an upbeat, inspiring, beautiful little boy… although I cried, I also celebrated the person he was. And your writing made me feel like I was a part of your life with your son, instead of just reading about it. Images came to mind. Like when you had to walk that long distance to the hospital with your son in your arms after your car broke down. There were so many others… and the laughs I had with the ghosts!  The feelings I experienced while reading –I … Read more
Lisa Salvati, TV News Reporter, New York (after reading Over the Rainbow Bridge)
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I loved this very human and touching story of a family’s journey with a terminally ill child. Although it was sad, it was also courageous and funny. It was far more about living than about dying, and offers a positive example for all of us to value each day. The messages about life beyond death’s door are intriguing, uplifting, and very believable. Thank you for a beautiful read.
Marcia Shaver (after reading Over the Rainbow Bridge)
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The written word can be very powerful and moving, and every so often there is a book that can truly change lives; Over the Rainbow Bridge is that important. It is a true account of a heroic child’s mission in his short life to teach us about love and life, that one and both are the same: eternal. In our culture, where death is almost a taboo subject, Over the Rainbow Bridge will help us confront our fears and embrace life in a “down to earth” way. It is accessible, a comfort to read, as if being embraced by an old friend.
Gei Chan, well-read Artist & Designer
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The greatest gift I received from reading “Over the Rainbow Bridge” is a comforting peace about death and dying. Death is not an ending, but the beginning of a new phase. Powerful. Thanks Cory for your wisdom.Through the life of this 9 year old boy, I learned more insights about heaven and the afterlife than I ever learned by attending church. I don’t know who I’m more impressed with—Cory, a young man who even in death was the most positive, inspirational person I never met; or his mother Shirley who had the courage to really list… Read more
Shelly Heesacker, Freelance TV Field Producer for ‘Oprah’ and ‘The Dr. Phil Show’
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This primer on grief is practical , honest, and totally on the money about feelings, thoughts, and behaviors which are part of the human experience of grief and loss. The six word lessons are understandable, strengthening, and probably because there are only ‘six words’ easily remembered. It also takes direct aim at the guilt experienced about ‘the need to talk about it’.
William M Womack MD, Psychiatrist ("Six Word Lessons" On Coping with Grief)
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Having dealt with the loss of my son, I can totally relate to this book. While reading it, I found myself reflecting back to the “stupid” things that people said to me when I was in the throes of so much pain that I couldn’t see past the very next second. I am comforted by Shirley’s words which are down to earth and easily understood. This book WILL help you if you let it. It is a quick read and is one of the things that I like most about it. Grief is a lifelong journey that changes over time so take care of your heart and read this book. It is… Read more
April Braykovich (Kirkland, WA) (after reading Six-Word Lessons on Coping with Grief)
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